Emotionally InvestedHe slowly fills me in on his life, Telling me about his losses and confusion. I long to ease his suffering. Tears silently fall from my eyes While he smokes a Marlbro. He is blind to the here and now As he shares his painful memories. Briefly he sees my tears, Tells me that he's not worth crying over. He doesn't want to hurt anyone, Drag them into his unsteady life. He'd rather be alone, For he knows that If she were to say that she wanted to fix them, He'd take her back in a heartbeat. Without hesitation He'd welcome her once again into his open arms. It leaves me torn and concerned, Leaves me emotionally
You SaidYou say that you want me to move in with you,That you want me back in your life.But you're the one who walked out of mine.How can I believe what you say?You said that you didn't mean to disappear,Didn't mean to hurt me.Yet you did it anyways.Why would I trust what you've said?You told me that you still love me,But when I tell you the same thing,You don't see how,When not even five minutes earlier,You told me"You don't just stop loving someone."How can I believe what you tell me,When you don't believe it yourself?
Yesterday, Today, TomorrowYesterday,My ex stopped by.Yesterday,I broke down,And he saw my tears,My pain.Yesterday,It was almost as if nothing bad happenedAs he kissed me for the last time.Today,Not one songCan explain how I feel.Today,Cut and pasteSongs togetherTo explainThe confusion,The pain,The memories brought to the surface.Today,I want to cry into a full bathtubAs my speakers playSongs for the broken-hearted,And my sweet releaseLets the pain flow freely.Tomorrow,I might regret standing thereFor so long,And letting my vulnerabilityBe so exposed.Tomorrow,My heart might start to heal,My pain may start
Where Is Your Reality?I can feel the bass through my feet.Lights flash before my eyesIn a blur of color.Neon clothes and make-upGlow beneath the black light.Bodies are being mashed togetherIn a dancing frenzy.We hug people we've just met,And become part of their familyThe next weekend.We all instinctively followA short code of conduct;PeaceLoveUnityRespectResponsibility.Five wordsThat make upOur underground world.We forget realityAnd go by different names.People recognize one anotherBy simple pieces of jewelry.I am Star Burst.I am a raver.I am one of thousands.Where is your reality?
The Wrong Cards Were PlayedOur marriage isn't going to happenQuite the way we wanted.Everything has to be put on holdFor a few years,Because the wrong cards were played.We have more time to plan thingsIn more detail,And we have time to save up.But I'll be without youFor a few YearsBecause the wrong cards were played.I know everything is left up to fate,But we also have free willAnd the power of choice.Now I will have to SufferHere without youFor a few yearsbecause of your choicesAnd the wrong cards were played.
So Much For Staying Friends...You had someone text meAsking for me to not contact you anymore...What is that about?It's been over three monthsSince I've talked to you...I only called you once,Sent you one text,and one friend request online...I miss you.What is so hard to understand about that?So much for staying friends...Just because things didn't work out as we planned,Doesn't mean we fade into a distant memory of one another...
Ignorance is BlissWhen someone says ignorance is bliss…It's a lie.She doesn't seeThe pain she is causing.It all startedOne quiet summer dayWith bubble tea.I started to fall for her.Her pale skin,Soft blonde hair,Beautifully blue eyes,Perfect smile.That was eight months ago…Her ignorance is her bliss,But it's also my pain.Every call goes to voicemail.Each text goes unanswered.Where did I go wrong?What did I do?She doesn't seeThe pain she is causing.I long to look into her blue eyes,Touch her pale skin,Play with her blonde hair,And see that perfect smile.But she's forgotten about me…I love her
For My Grandfather:: A tributeMy grandfather was only 66,On September 25, 2010When he left this world.I miss him,More than I have shown.I haven't cried,Haven't let my emotions be seen.Though normally,I can barely keepMy head level.Why now,Do I have the abilityTo keep a lid tightly sealed?Hearts seem to beat slowerDuring a funeral,Or a memorial.Tears fall faster than most realize.We take the time to grieve,Those who have left this earth.Some leave without pain,Without suffering.Others pass on without rememberingThe day before,Or that they told their son,Directly for the first time,"I love you, Scott."My dad became a littl
TearsTears well,In the corners of my eyes,Threatening to fall...I walk in the doorAnd know thatEven though there might be people home,I'm alone...My bed will be empty,And these threatening tears will fall,Only to hit a cold pillow...I love you...My heart aches every time we're apart...Please help me cease these tears...I don't know exactly what to do...Pathetic,I know...It makes me feel helplessTo know that I can't function completelyWithout you...I love you so much...Help me understandWhat I'm going through...This is all new to me...As these tears threaten to fall...
NegativeI see them everywhere...New mothers,Brand new babies.You see me get starry eyed,And you know I want one.But I'm only seventeen...I know you rememberWhen we thought I could have been pregnant...I took the testAt the recommended time...The test was negative...You were so relieved,I was disappointed..."We're too young"Was all you saidAs I laid in bed and cried.Never did it occur to you,That I was hoping,Hoping for a positive result...I was excited...My thoughts and dreamsWere of us as a family,Holding our new baby...It felt right,Perfect...You never saw the tearsThat were shed,After the test
NumbNo more pain,Or tears.For I am numb inside.There is a burning heatBut knowing what it is,I do not.Knowing that it is there,Keeps me going,Going and living day to day.If the heat is released,The pain will returnAlong with the tears.Why won't they go away,Go away for eternity.Please just let me stay numb.I can't take anymore pain.No,Please no more...The pain would kill me...
Through Your EyesI wish I could see things,See things through your eyes.To be able to see myselfThe way you see me.You see me as beautiful.I see myself as tolerable.You see the world's natural beauty,What I see is a polluted city.Through your eyes,The stars shine bright.My eyes shine even brighter you say.I saythe stars are just just gasous dots,And that my eyes are a dull grey.I want to see the worldThrough your eyes and not mine.Mine pickout the cruel and the ugly.Yours pick out the amazing and the beautiful.I can tell you think I'm gorgeous.Have your opinion,And I'll have mine.But to see the world for one dayThoug
Among the LivingI wonder what it's like among the living...Is it bright,Cheery,Peaceful?Probably the complete oppositeOf this place I'm imprisoned in.What does it mean to be living?I have a heartbeat.I can feel physicalAnd emotional pain.Does that entitle that I live?People tell me so.But I'm never at peace,Never happy,Always dark.Maybe I become aliveOnce I turn 18.Or after I move inWith the love of my "life"Let me at least knowHappinessWithout haunting of nightmares.Just one day,I don't want to be dark.Take me to the land of the living.
Our Secret EmbraceThe secrets of the dayPlay in our minds.Sneaking around to hold each otherIn our intimate ways.Holding our breathAt every sound.Time seems to moveAll too fast,During our embrace.Nobody can know,When we are together.Parents would forbidOne another,Causing more secret embraces.I long for the dayWhen we can be together finallyAnd fully.No one will careWe'll be adults,Be able to make our own decisionsYou'll tell me you love meIn front of everyoneWhile I'm shrouded in white,I'll say it back,Before you slip that ringOnto my delicate finger.However,We must keep us a secretAnd continue to sneak
Night PersonifiedI am the nightCan you see me?If you can at all.Sometimes I can be completely dark,While others,The moon lights your path.Ah,The moon.My friend,My enemy,My ally.She sits in my skyWatching over allAs I blanket the world in darkness.No one realizes that I blanket them.They take me for granted.Yet I'm hereAs I have been since the dawn of time.I am the dark that falls before you fall into slumberI hold the stars for you to watchIn wonder and in awe.
Bubble TeaWe walked to the Lyon's Den.He bought us bubble tea.You and I,Had a side conversationThrough texts.He was jealous.We didn't care.We kept flirting.There is a smallPhysical attraction.Our personalitiesAre completely opposite.That's why we get along so well.We tell one anotherThat I love youAnd you love me.We're best friends.Our friendshipStarted up the steep hillAfter that cupOf bubble tea.We trust each other.I'm addictedTo that frozen drinkBecause it reminds meOf you smiling,Your laughter,Of your eyesTwinkling with joy.I love bubble teaBecause I love you.
Amanda PandaAmazingMultilingualArtsyNorwegianDaringAngelic (for lack of another "a" word)PlayfulAloofNeatDown to earthAbstract
Sta.sh
